Because I Love You
by luvjonasbros
Summary: Macy wasn't planning on seeing her ex today, but when Kevin comes back to try and fix things with her, Macy might not be able to keep the secret she has been harboring for over a year and a half. Set in the future, slight AU, Kacy with slight Joella
1. Because I Love You

**Authors Note: This is my first story on this site, so hopefully it is up to par. Reviews are always welcome, don't be afraid to critize. **

**Disclaimer: I unfortunately do not own the show Jonas, it belongs to Disney. I just own the volume one DVD. **

When I got up this morning I was planning on ignoring him completely, something that I've been doing pretty well for the past year and a half, but today was different. Today I received a voicemail saying he wanted to talk to me, and apologize for all the hurt he caused me, he wanted a second chance. I was driving to work with the radio on when I heard him and his brothers singing 'When You Look Me in the Eyes' I've always loved and hated that song. He told me he came up with the lyrics for me when he was a senior at Horace antis, and I was a sophomore. Now, he is 23 and I'm 21 both of us are out doing totally different things.

When I finally arrived at work I saw something I wasn't expecting to ever see again, I saw part of the Lucas clan sitting outside their tour bus. I couldn't let them see me, so I drove around back, and parked my car. After debating whether I should take off work or not, I decided that I couldn't take a day off, it wasn't possible so I pulled my keys out of the ignition. As I to turn my phone on vibrate, I saw I had a new text from Joe.

He saw you drive around back don't be surprised if he pops out of no where. ~ Joe

I hadn't expected Joe to text me, he usually got a kick out of seeing me embarrassed. I knew I would have to face him eventually so I got out of my car and started to walk to the back door of Cadillac Palace Theatre, also known as my place of employment.  
"Macy wait" I heard him call out, but I didn't reply I just kept walking to the theatre.

"Macy, please" He pleaded as he grabbed my shoulder turning me to face him "Please just talk to me. Tell me why you've been ignoring me for the past year and a half"

I couldn't take it any more I had to say something to him or I was going to break, "Kevin we broke up, remember, you said you wanted to take a break, and then you started going out with Zoe. We ended our relationship that's why I've been ignoring you"

"I still wanted to have my best friend and you know that" He replied quickly

"But I couldn't have you as just a friend, it would have made the situation more complicated than what it already was" I replied

"What situation, the fact that you couldn't see me with another girl? Was that the situation?" He asked

"Look Kevin, I have to... Hold On" my phone started to ring

"Hello?...mmhmm...I didn't know....yes I'm on my way...okay thank you" Was all Kevin could hear me say. I then walked into my work told my boss I had to leave because of a family emergency, and then proceeded to head out to my car; he followed.

"Macy where are you going; We were talking" He asked

"Kevin I have something more important to deal with right now and I have to leave" I told him harshly

With that I got into my CR-V, started my car and drove off to the daycare.  
I walked into the daycare to see Paul and Elizabeth with their 'teacher' waiting for me. I rushed over to them and gave them both a kiss on their foreheads.  
"We are sorry to worry you, but Paul was running a 101 fever, and Elizabeth had a cough, and we just can't really expose the rest of the children to that" Their 'teacher' told me

"Oh no it's okay, I'll take them home, thank you for telling me" With that I took Paul and put him in his car seat, then took Elie and did the same. I drove home to see the JONAS tour bus parked on the side of the street, Kevin waiting at my door, Joe, Nick, and Stella looking out the window of the bus. This was going to be an awkward situation. I parked my car in the drive way and opened up the left backseat door and took Paul out of his car seat, then walked up to the door.

"Kevin could you move please?" I asked politely

"Of course" He replied while a puzzled look made its way on to his face

"Kevin I feel really bad for asking this, but could you go get Elie out of her car seat and bring her in the house, I have my hands full"  
He just nodded and walked over to my car, while he was doing that I unlocked my door, walked into the living room and set the curly brown haired, hazel eyed baby in his playpen. Kevin walked in with Elie and I had him put the brown curly haired, brown eyed baby in her playpen. I asked him to lock my car while I got medicine for the babies, and of course he said he would, but that was all he had said to me since he saw Paul in my arms. I gave Paul and Elie their medicine and a bottle and soon the two 9 month old babies were sound asleep. I just sat down and watched my two blessings sleep peacefully, then looked up to see Kevin standing awkwardly.  
"You know you can sit down Kevin" I told him  
"Oh, okay" He sat down and looked at Paul "She has your eyes" he  
"Yeah, but her dad and brothers hair" I replied with a laugh  
"What is his name" He asked already knowing Elie's name  
"Paul, and Elie is short for Elizabeth"  
"How old are they?"  
"9 months"  
"Where is your husband?"  
"I don't have one" I replied simply  
"Then where is their father?"

"He isn't in the picture right now" I replied, never making eye contact with Kevin

"Macy who is…" Kevin started asking, but was soon cut off by my doorbell

"Sorry Kevin, I need to answer that" I said while quickly standing up and walking to the front door.

To say I was surprised to see my best friend and two remaining JONAS members at my door would be a lie, and I made it known to them when I opened the door.

"I was wondering when you guys were going to be knocking" I said with a smirk

"MACY!" Stella shrieked

"Stella, the kids are sleeping, keep it down" I scolded as we hugged

"Sorry, so how are my lovely niece and nephew?" Stella asked

"They are both sick, so I'm having to stay here with them today" I informed her, then looked to the two speechless Lucas boys standing in my doorway (this sight, and silence from the two was rare from them)

"Joseph, Nicholas" Stella scolded "Shut your mouths, if you get drool on these new outfits you will not be happy"

"Sorry Stells" Joe replied to his fiancé, then turned to face me "what is up Macy? I haven't seen you in about a year and a half"

"The sky is up, and the living room is this way, so why don't we migrate that way" I retorted as I heard Elie start to cry.

The short walk from my front door to the living room was filled with glances and glares between the three newcomers. As we walked in I saw Kevin holding Elie, rocking her back and forth, calming her down in the shortest amount of time I've ever experienced.

Kevin looked up to see the four of us then attempted to explain what he was doing "Sorry Macy, she was fussing, and I thought that I might be able to calm her down" He said quickly

"It's fine Kevin" I told him as I went to sit down on my couch "That's the quickest I've ever seen her calm down, she must really like you"

"I wonder why" Stella muttered sarcastically

"What did you say babe?" Joe asked

"I said I wonder why" Stella repeated while looking at me harshly

"Stella don't"

"Tell them Macy, or I will" She gave me an ultimatum

"Tell us what?" The three Lucas boys asked in unison

"Tell you guys why Elie there loves Kevin so much" Stella replied

"Babies love Kevin, it's a proven fact" Joe replied

"Yeah well that baby loves Kevin for a different reason" Stella told the boys

"What is she talking about Macy?" Kevin asked, Elie still in his arms

"You know when you asked where their father was?" I asked Kevin, he nodded for me to continue, "Well he has been out living his dream of being in a band" I said quietly  
"Wh…what?" Kevin stuttered  
"His full name is Paul Kevin Lucas-Misa, and that is Elizabeth Denise Lucas-Misa"  
"Those kids are Kevin's?" Nick asked, speaking for the first time since entering the house

All I could do was nod while looking at Kevin

"Why didn't you tell me about them Macy?" Kevin asked with a hurt look on his beautiful face

"Because I love you"


	2. Chapter 2: Silence

**A/N: So I wasn't planning on making this into a story, but you all liked it, so I decided to continue with the story. I know the characters seem a little OOC, but that is part of the story. Hope you like the 2nd chapter, b/c i skipped doing homework to type this. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Jonas, Disney does. I just own the volume 1 DVD, and calendar**

Chapter 2: Silence

Silence. Silence was the only thing that filled the house for several awkward minutes. Kevin kept attempting to make eye contact with me, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't handle the disappointment in his eyes, the solemnity on his beautiful facial features. The overbearing silence was finally put to shame when the wailing of Paul came about. At that point my feeling of guilt and fear were out weighed by my motherly instincts, causing me to rush hover and pick up my baby boy.

"Shh…Shh" I sounded while rocking back and forth "Everything is okay" I told him, instantly calming him.

"Is everything really okay Mace, or are you lying to him like you lied to me?" Kevin asked bitterness dripping from every syllable.

"Stella?" I asked, pretending I didn't hear a word Kevin said

"Yeah Mace?" she replied in an uncharacteristically soft whisper

"Do you remember where the nursery is?" I asked, getting only a nod in response from my best friend

"Can you please take Paul and Elie to the nursery, and place them in their cribs?"

"Sure, but I need someone to take one of the babies, I can't carry both" She replied, the last part, aimed towards her fiancé, and his younger brother

"I will" Joe volunteered, a smile gracing his face in addition to the response

Silence once again reared its ugly head as the couple took the twins: Joe taking Elie from Kevin, Stella taking Paul from me, as well as giving me a reassuring nod.

"Nick, why don't we go sing to our little niece and nephew, I'm sure they would love it" Joe said, practically glaring at his younger brother.

"Sure" was all that escaped Nick's lips.

For the umpteenth time in the past half hour, silence filled the living room, and I onoce again took to analyzing my amazingly clean carpet.

"Your reason doesn't make sense Macy" Kevin told me as soon as we could hear his brothers singing to my, I mean, our kids.

"Why doesn't it make sense Kevin?" I asked truly intrigued.

"It doesn't make sense because the statement 'Because I love you' isn't a reason, it's as I said before, a statement" He said in a matter of fact tone.

"Statements can be reasons, in fact, reasons usually are statements" I retorted, while plopping my self down on my blue couch.

"Why do you insist on being so difficult Macy?" He almost screamed "Can't you just act like an adult for once?" he asked his tone a little lower

"Do. Not. Tell me to act like an adult, when all I have been doing this past year and a half is being a responsible adult Kevin." I retorted, my Pilipino temper slowly making its way to the surface

"Well maybe if you would have told me you were pregnant I could have helped make you into a better adult, as well as helped with my children" Kevin replied

"A better adult?" I asked insulted

"Yes a better adult Macy"

"Your children?" I asked going back to his, what I classify as an, insult.

"Yes my children, who I should have known about as soon as they were conceived." He told me, and then asked "Were you ever going to tell me about them?"

"Yes I was, as a matter of fact, I was going to tell you the day you decided to that you had fallen out of love with me. The day you said you would always love me like you love bears in a bikini, or Stella, but you were IN LOVE with Zoe." I almost yelled as tears ran down my cheeks.

"You still could have told me Macy! You could have told me about Paul and Elie" Kevin replied flustered, as well as taken aback by my last comment

"And what Kevin?" I asked him "Have you leave Zoe because of me? Because you felt sorry for me? No. I decided I wasn't going to take you away from her, not the way she took you away from me. Two wrongs don't make a right. So I decided to let you be happy with her, all because I freaking loved you" I told him, tears clouding my vision, making it impossible to see the tears coming down his cheeks.

"Loved?" He asked, hurt evident in his voice "What happened to the reason 'because I LOVE you'?"

"I love my Kevin, the Kevin I ORIGINALLY fell in love with, the one who was happy go lucky, and smiled all the time. Not this Kevin in front of me, not this Kevin who told me he didn't understand my reason, not this Kevin who said I'm not a good adult, this Kevin is a stranger to me" Of course I busted into hysterics as I hit the middle of my mini monologue.

I waited for a response from him, but instead heard footsteps, as well as whispering, but I could care less. I had lost the love of my life to himself, to change I guess. As I continued contemplating where my Kevin went I realized that my brown eyes probably looked blood-shot, as the tears continued cascading down my cheeks, continuing to blur my vision.

As my tears continued to fall I felt a shift in the couch, then a pair of arms holding me as the slam of a door, most likely the front, was heard.

"He'll come around eventually Macy, he just needs time" Joe told me

"The thing is Joe, I don't know how much time I can give him" I whispered

"Why can't you give him much time Mace?" Joe asked

"Because he is slowly breaking me, and sooner or later I'm not going to be able to be fixed." I told him with finality in my voice.

After that Joe held me tighter in his arms, rubbing circles on my back trying to calm me down. I eventually calmed down, and started to fall asleep, but before I did I heard Joe whisper "Lets hope for everybody's sake that he doesn't need that much time, because I don't think I can handle loosing my sister and brother"

As Joe finished whispering his thoughts silence started to envelop my consciousness, and for once I was okay with the silence.

**A/N #2: Please review so I know that people actually like and/or dislike the story**


	3. Chapter 3: Keyword being Hoped

**a/n: this is a longer chapter, with a lot of dialogue and it reveals the past, so i hope you like it. I would also like to thank everyone reviewing, favoriting, and alerting this story, it means a lot. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own the show Jonas.  
****I really really want to, but i don't, I really want to, but I don't, I really want to, but I don't. **

Chapter 3: Keyword Hoped

*_flashback*_

_Today as I walked to the firehouse I felt like the sun was shinning brighter then it had all week, and I hoped to take that as a sign of a good day, keyword hoped. I couldn't believe the news I had received earlier in the morning, it was happy, and scary all at the same time; this morning I found out I was pregnant at age 19, and to top it off my boyfriend is only 21, and an international pop star. While walking to his house I tried to imagine the different scenarios that could play out after I told him, the one I hoped for was him being elated to be a father, but once again the keyword was hoped. Soon I was coming up to the firehouse and as I walked up to knock on the door Joe and Stella appeared in the doorway walking out, both carrying happy faces until they saw me, then their faces contorted to some almost pitiful stare as they let me in. The couples glances made me nervous, more nervous then I had been before, but I knew that I had to walk in and tell Kevin the news I had. I first walked to the kitchen after smelling some insanely good cookies, and saw that Nick was making his infamous blue chews while writing a song, wow that boy could multitask. _

"_Hey Macy" Nick said with a slight smile on his face when he saw me. _

"_Hey Nick, the cookies smell amazing" I told him_

"_Want to taste one? I don't know if they taste right" He asked_

"_I'm sure they taste fantastic, but you know I'll try one anyway" I said while taking a cookie off the baking sheet _

_As I chewed the blue chew Nick kept staring at me, waiting for my opinion. After tormenting him for a minute I finally spoke "Well I hate to tell you this Nick, but I think this was the best blue chew I've tasted, apparently your others weren't good enough" _

"_Haha very funny Macy" He retorted to my smart aleck comment. "So are you here to see Kevin?" he asked_

"_Yeah, I have something important I need to tell him" I told him, the nerves returning again_

"_He is upstairs" Nick told me while motioning towards the stairs with his head. _

_As I started my ascent up the stairs Nick called out to me one last time "Mace" he said_

_I just nodded my head in response_

"_Remember that whatever happens we'll still be here for you" he said_

"_Um okay" was all I could reply as I continued up the stairs _

_As I reached the top I heard two voices, one being Kevin's, the other was a girls, a girl I didn't know. I wasn't sure how to approach them, so I just called out that I was there. _

"_Kevin?" I somewhat ask_

"_Um, hey Mace" He replied as he saw me enter the boys room. _

"_Hey" I said as I walked over to give him a hug and kiss, but instead of on the lips like usual, he turned so I got his cheek. _

"_Who is this?" I asked acknowledging the five foot eight, brunette girl in the room _

"_This is Zoe" He said with voice that sounded like he was in a dream "She was in our music video for Work It Out, and we clicked and became friends" _

_As Kevin was talking about Zoe I saw the look in his eyes, it was the look he usually gave me, keyword usually. Kevin continued to talk about Zoe and how they both enjoyed going to the zoo and thinking of different music combinations for them. The more he droned on, the more I realized he had fallen for her, and I wasn't going to be able to tell him my news. _

"_So Mace, why did you come here?" Zoe asked me, in a somewhat snotty tone_

"_Oh I just needed to tell Kevin something" I replied, still unsure about her. _

"_Why don't you go downstairs Zoe, and I'll talk to Macy" Kevin told her_

_As soon as I heard Zoe talking to Nick in the kitchen I asked Kevin a simple question "Do you like her?" _

"_What? No?" He replied in his high squeaky lying voice_

"_Please don't lie to me Kevin, I don't appreciate being lied too" I scolded_

"_Well what am I supposed to say to you Macy, yes I'm in love with her?" He asked_

"_You're in love with her?" I asked_

"_Yeah, I love you to Macy, but I'm just not IN love with you anymore. I love you like I love bears in bikini's, or Stella" he explained_

"_Okay" was all I replied_

"_Okay?" he asked flabbergasted _

"_I want you to be happy Kevin, and if you are in love with her I want you to be with her" I told him. _

"_Are you sure?" He asked_

"_Yes, you out of all the people I know deserve to be happy" _

"_Mace, can I still keep you as my best friend" He asked reminding me of a young child_

"_Of course, now I'm going to get going" I replied, then started to walk away_

"_Wait Macy! What was it you were going to tell me?" Kevin asked as I got close to the door_

"_It's nothing you need to worry about Kevin" I said then walked out the door to go to Stella's house. _

_As soon as I was a safe distance from the firehouse I started crying, five minutes l arrived at Stella's. She immediately engulfed me in a hug when she saw me balling my eyes out._

"_What happened Mace?" She asked_

"_We broke up because I love him, and I wanted him to be happy" I attempted to get out_

"_Aww, sweetie I'm so sorry, are you going to be okay?" she asked_

"_I don't know, but Stella, there is something else" I told her_

"_What is it?" She prodded _

"_I'm…I'm…I'm pregnant" I stuttered_

"_Oh Mace" she exclaimed as she held me tighter and tried to comfort me on her front porch. "What are you going to do?" _

"_I'm going to raise my child with as much love as I possibly can, and hopefully that will be enough" _

"_I'm so proud of you Macy, I'll try and help you as much as I can, and I'm sure the Joe will love being an uncle" She exclaimed_

"_Stells, please don't tell Joe or the boys, I don't want to ruin their careers or their lives because of my child, they don't need that kind of publicity" I stressed my point to her_

"_But they have a right to know Macy, especially Kevin, he is the father" She tried convincing me_

"_I know, but he has a new life now, and I don't want to make it complicated, so please don't tell them, I'm begging you Stella" _

"_Fine" She replied curtly. _


	4. Chapter 4:Whispers

_I don't own JONAS, or Kevin, or Joe, or Nick, or Macy, or Stella, they are owned by Disney.  
I do however own Paul and Elie...i think...haha_

Chapter 4: Whispers

I soon woke up from my dream, or flashback, whatever would be best to call it, and realized that I was no longer being held by Joe, but was lying on the couch covered by a blanket. Not even five minutes later I heard whispers coming from my kitchen, and me being me I decided to pull a Sherlock Holmes, and investigate. While walking to the dinning room I noticed that it was snowing…in November…gosh dang it, anyways I soon noticed, well actually heard 3 voices, Nick's, Stella's, and Joe's. Me being me, I couldn't help but eavesdrop on their quiet conversation…oh who am I kidding they are never quiet.

"Stella you should have told us!" Nick exclaimed

"She didn't want me to Nick, and I'm not going to break a promise to my best friend" Stella retorted

"Do you know how hard this is going to be on us now Stella? When the press finds out that Kevin had kids, and didn't even know about them, they are going to have a field day!" he yelled

"Keep your voice down Nick, Macy is sleeping" Stella almost yelled herself

"Oh I'm so sorry for almost waking sleeping Macy" Nick said sarcastically

"Nick, don't treat Macy like this, like she is a bad person. She didn't tell you guys about the kids because she wanted to protect you" Stella exclaimed

"Protect us Stella? She has just caused us a huge mess" Nick retorted

I wasn't sure when it happened, but my face was soon covered in tears, tears I didn't know would come considering I thought I was out of tears.

"Nick imagine what would have happened if the press found out about Paul and Elie when they were first born, when Macy was only 20, and Kevin was 22. There would be a bigger field day then what apparently is going to happen, and at least now the babies were able to be out of the spotlight for their first couple of months." Stella defended me once again.

"Joe please back me up" Nick pleaded

"Joe you know I'm right you need to agree with me" Stella also pleaded

"Will both of you shut up…please" Joe asked "I love you both, but can you please stop thinking about the press, or even our lovely niece and nephew, and think about what Kevin and Macy must be feeling and going through"

"What do you mean Joe?" Nick asked annoyed

"What I mean is did you see both of their faces when they saw each other" Joe asked, both his brother and fiancé shaking their heads

"Did you see their faces when Kevin found out those kids were his" he asked, shaking came once again from the duo

"What about Kevin's tear stained face after they had their 'discussion', or when he slammed the door shut? Did you guys see Macy after Kevin left, she was distraught, did you guys see any of that?" Joe asked

"No" they both whispered

"Don't you guys understand this is hurting them so badly, it tearing them apart, and the worst thing is that they both love each other so much, but both are so hurt from each other and everything that is going against them at this point" Joe told them "Macy was so hurt from the awkward ending of their relationship, and Kevin was hurt from Macy giving up so easily, as well as the way Zoe used him" Joe continued

"I guess we didn't really pay that much attention Joe" Nick told him

"Well maybe you should pay less attention to making us look and sound good, and spend more time paying attention to who is important to us" Joe told them.

I couldn't listen or watch any longer so I quietly climbed the stairs up to the nursery to check on Paul and Elie. I decided to just watch the twins interact with each other and their toys from the door way. For some odd reason they both had some sort of plastic baby music instrument that they were playing with.

"You know they are already showing signs of being great musicians" I heard from behind me

"Oh really?" I whispered

"Yeah. Joe and I were singing to them, and they decided to join in, they were quite good from being only 9 months" Nick explained

"They get it from their father" I said "And uncles of course"

"Look Macy, I'm sorry if you heard that conversation down there. I know I sounded like a jerk, but I guess I was slightly hurt when I was saying some of that" He told me

"Why were you hurt Nick? It's not like they are your kids" I replied, being slightly curious

"I was hurt because you didn't come back to us, or say anything to us after you and Kevin broke up, and that hurt me Mace, because you were one of the only people besides my family who understood me, and my weird thinking." Nick explained

"I couldn't come back Nick, not after everything that had happened between Kevin and I. I couldn't go to the firehouse and see him and Zoe" I said, venom dripping off the last word.

"I never liked Zoe, I thought she was a video girl, and turns out I was right. She changed him Mace, she made him into someone I never expected, and never wanted my brother to be, as crazy as it sounds Macy I miss the old Kevin, the Kevin he was when he was with you." Nick was finally opening up to me

"I miss that Kevin too, but I don't know how to bring him back Nick" I told him honestly

"I also miss the old Macy. The one who would tell us everything, and smile all the time, not just when she sees her kids" Nick informed me

"I miss her too Nick, but there is no way I can go back to being that Macy, not after what has happened" I said tears once again escaping my eyes as I continued to watch my beautiful babies attempt to make music.

"Maybe not the old Macy completely, but maybe you could bring back the part that smiled all the time, the scowl type look, that's mine, you can't have it" Nick joked on the last part

"Well maybe I make the scowl look good unlike you" I said jokingly while still watching the babies

"Or maybe you make a smile look gorgeous, and should leave the scowling to Nick" a voice from behind said

* * *

**A/N: I hope you all enjoyed reading chapter 4 as much as I enjoyed writing it for you. I'm really excited about the amazing feedback i've been getting, it kinda blows my mind how much you guys like what i write. I hope you all have a fantastic day, and are doing amazingly in whatever it is you like to do! Thanks again for the support, ch. 5 should be up in a few days!**


	5. 5: I Can Forgive It, I Can't Forget It

**Sorry I haven't updated in a while I've been so super busy this past month with the finishing of my last musical (we did Beauty and the Beast, sold out EVERY preformance!), finishing prom planning, and to top it off I've been sick. It keeps surprising me when I get e-mails saying that my stories are getting alerted, and I'm being favorited even though I haven't updated, so thank you to everyone who has done any of that, it always makes me smile (as do reviews. hehe). I based part of the chapter of a lyric from Aly and AJ's song "Flattery" so I hope you enjoy this chapter; it's not one of my best, but it is one of my favorites. Love you all!**

**A/N: I don't own Jonas, which is slightly depressing, but I'll be okay =)  
**

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* * *

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_"I can forgive it, I can't forget, You left me here with all these scars" --Aly and AJ "Flattery"_

Chapter 5: I Can Forgive It, I Can't Forget It

"_Or maybe you make a smile look gorgeous, and should leave the scowling to Nick" a voice from behind said_

"Haha Stella, thanks for trying to make me feel better" I told my best friend who had snuck up behind Nick and me.

"I mean it Macy; you have a face made for smiling, Nick as a face made for scowling. It's all in the facial structure" Stella replied in a somewhat serious tone

"Okay Stells I get it, I need to smile more" I attempted to appease her

"That's not the only thing you need to do Macy, you need to be happy." She said seriously

"I am happy Stella, just not as happy as I used to be, that's just life" I said as I was turning to look at her.

"Well 'life' brought back Kevin for a reason. You were the happiest person on the planet when you were with Kevin, maybe bringing him back is the way for the world's way of trying to make you happy" Stella said

"Stella, please don't…" Macy started

"No Macy, You will listen to me for once. I care about Macy, WE care about you. Me, Nick, Joe, _and _Kevin all care about you. Sure Kevin made a mistake when he wanted to go out with Zoe, and he knows that, he regrets that, but all he has been doing lately is asking how you are, if you have met someone new, if you still might have any feelings for him. He cares, and loves you so much Macy, and I know you love him, so please try and talk to him, for both of your sakes" Stella pleaded

"I tried Stella, but we just ended up yelling at each other, and pointing out each others faults. He made it pretty clear by some of his comments that he doesn't want or love me anymore" I cried out, tears coming once more, blurring my vision

Stella raced up and cradled me in her arms while guiding me to my bedroom. "I'm sure he didn't mean what he said Macy. He loves you, I know he does" She told me as I continued to cry into her blouse

"N…No he…he does…doesn't. He ha…hates m…me" I stuttered out

"I could _never_ hate you Macy" I heard a masculine voice say

I turned out of Stella's comforting embrace and saw what seemed to be the outline of Kevin, but I couldn't be sure because of the tears.

"I'll leave you two to talk" Stella said as she walked out of my room, leaving an awkward silence in her wake.

I shimmied my way up to the head of my bed, leaning against the head board as Kevin made his way towards the bed sitting on the edge of the bed while taking a picture off of my night stand. In the picture he had his arms wrapped around my waist from behind, my head leaning back into the crook of his neck, both of us laughing. The picture was of Kevin and me at a beach bon fire the night of our 2 year anniversary. Kevin had taken me out to a nice dinner, and then took me to the beach for a surprise party with all of our friends. After the bon fire Kevin took me to my empty home since my parents were out of town for business, I invited him in to watch a movie, but the night ended in my two blessings known as Paul and Elie.

"I remember this night" Kevin said out of the blue as he showed me the picture "It was one of the best nights of my life, not because of what we had done late that night, but because of how much you smiled, and how happy you were, it made me happy" he finished

"I loved that night too, that's why I keep that picture on my night stand" I explained

"I wasn't really in love with her you know" He said as he placed the picture back next to the lamp

"What?" I was thoroughly confused

"I was never in love with Zoe, I was just so afraid of us Mace. I was afraid we were falling too fast, too deep, and that you would eventually not want me anymore. I was afraid of that heartbreak, so I broke up with you first, and tried to use Zoe as an excuse, I've never stopped loving you Macy." He told me as he put his head in his hands.

"Don't humor me Kevin, if you don't love me you can tell me" I told him

"I do love you Macy, so much it hurts. The comments I made earlier were made out of shock, and anger; I mean you didn't tell me I had two gorgeous babies, I've missed things in my children's lives, I was hurt and wanted you to hurt too" He said in what seemed like an honest voice

"You wanted me to hurt as well? Because you know I hadn't been through enough, losing you, losing your family that was like a second family to me, losing my heart, oh and you know the actual physical hurt of child birth. Apparently I hadn't hurt enough, you had to add to my pain? How sweet of you Kevin" I sobbed, turning to lie on my side facing away from him.

"Macy I wasn't thinking at the time, I know I have hurt you in so many ways that you shouldn't even begin to forgive me for, but you have to believe that I'm so in LOVE with you that I would do anything to get you back" Kevin pleaded as he crawled up on my bed, attempting to hold me in his arms. I gave in after he started rubbing my back and turned to face him, then cried into his, what I now noticed to be, already damp shirt.

"You have no idea how much I want to hate you right now, how much I want to send you away from me, how much I want to stop loving you, but I can't, I can't to any of those things"

"Then don't, let me stay with you, let yourself love me" Kevin pleaded

"That's another thing I can't do Kevin, I can't let myself love you, I can't put myself out there for you again. What if you break me again? I'm just now picking up the pieces you left me in, if you break me again I won't survive" I told him

We were silent for a little while as I set my head against his chest, and he rubbed my back, making different designs.

"Wh…" We both started then cut off, "You go, no you" we said once again in unison

"Ladies first" Kevin said

"Why did you come back after that fight earlier? I didn't think you would come back" I said

"Honestly, I wasn't sure if I was going to come back, I wasn't sure if you would have me back, but I ended up talking to someone at the park that helped me realize that I needed to come back." He replied

"If you don't mind me asking, who did you talk to?" I asked

"Joe. He found me at the park and talked to me about life, and how I was making so many mistakes. I didn't know he could be that deep actually." He chuckled the last part.

"Well that's Joe for you" I laughed "So what were you going to ask?"

"Oh well I was just wondering what I could do to help you forgive me" Kevin whispered

"I've already forgiven you Kevin, for the comments from earlier, for breaking up with me, because I now understand why you did that, but I just don't know if I can forget everything that happened, and trust you again. You've left me with a lot of scars that I don't know will ever go away." I replied, tears once again threatening to come out.

"I know I've hurt you more then you deserve, and I know that what I've done doesn't deserve to be forgiven or forgotten, but I promise you that I will gain your trust and love back, if it's the last thing I do" Kevin said then kissed me on the top of my head.


	6. Chapter 6: Lilliles and Words

**Sorry I haven't updated in a while, it's a crazy time of year for me, but i'll talk about that later, continue on with the story.  
Disclaimer: I don't own Jonas, i know it's sad.  
**

Chapter 6: lilies and words

I woke up the next morning to the sound of giggling coming from the twins room. Smiling to myself, I gradually picked myself out of my bed noticing Kevin was no longer there; instead a single stargazer lily was in his place. My smile widened at the sight of my favorite flower because even after all these years he remembered. I was taken out of my trance like state by a flash coming from the door way. Joe stood there with his Polaroid camera and 'film' that had just come out.  
"There is the famous Macy Misa smile I know and love, I thought it had gone extinct" Joe said as I rolled my eyes  
"And there are the famous Joe Lucas comments I DIDN'T miss" I retorted while walking over to my closet and taking out a robe.  
"You know Mace, sarcasm doesn't fit your personality" he yelled, making sure I heard his comment  
"yeah well your pants don't fit your legs, so how about we call it even" I said as I walked out of my closet going towards my door.  
"Touchè Misa" he said as I reached my door  
"If you could please move out of my way I need to go feed my babies" I said as he continued to stand in my way  
"No need to worry about that Mace. Kevin already fed them, gave them medicine and bathed them" Joe informed me  
"He what?" I asked slightly flabbergasted  
"Go look for yourself" he said pointing towards the twins room I moved hastily past him, walked down the hall to see both the babies sitting on the floor playing with a few plastic toys. I hesitated on whether to go in the room, or not to when I heard someone talking.  
"Daddy loves you both very much. Did you know that? Even though he hasn't known you very long he loves you alot" I heard, then smiled to myself  
"Mommy was trying to protect you guys and daddy from getting hurt, she loves you lots as well." I knew by that sentence and deep voice that it was Kevin talking. I moved slightly in the doorway to be able to see Kevin as well as Elie and Paul. Kevin's smile matched the babies, all three so happy. Just as I was about to make my presence known Kevin pulled something from his wallet.  
"See mommy and daddy when we were younger? See how happy we were?" he asked the babies.  
"Momma?" Paul asked  
"Dadda?" Elie then asked as both pointed to the old photograph  
I couldn't help but cry, those were their first words, and Kevin had been able to witness them. I guess Kevin heard me sniffling and looked up to see me.  
"Macy what is wrong? Did I do something?" Kevin asked flustered as he attempted to stand up quickly, and come over to stand in front of me  
"you didn't do anything wrong at all Kevin, you just, you got them to say their first words" I said slightly hysterical  
"wait, you...you mean I got to hear their first words?" he asked with tears in his eyes  
I could only nod, knowing he wouldn't be able to understand a word I said if I decided to speak  
"I got to witness a first for them! I...I can't believe it" he said hugging me as tears rolled down his cheeks  
We stayed in the embrace for about a minute until we heard "mamma?"  
I turned to see both children looking at Kevin and I, huge grins plastered to their faces.  
"Yes sweetie?" I asked as I bent down to pick up Paul, who was the baby to speak. Paul just pointed to the hallway after he was in my arms.  
"What's in the hallway sweetie?" I asked him not expecting an answer.  
"Unkie" came out of his mouth instead of the usual gurgled response

Both Kevin and I turned to look down the hallway, and saw that Joe was now standing in the hallway instead of the entrance to my bedroom.

"Did he just say unkie?" Joe asked, astonishment sketched upon his face

"Yeah he did" Kevin replied while picking up Elie from her seat on the ground

"Way to go little man!" Joe exclaimed, attempting to give Paul a high-five…epic fail.

"Joe quiet down, you don't want to wake Macy" Stella scolded while typing on her cell.

"Good morning Stella" I said happily causing Stella to snap her head up quickly

"Don't give yourself whiplash Stella" Joe scolded just as Stella had earlier.

"AUTIE!!" Elie screamed, wiggling in Kevin's arms, pointing to Stella

"That is Auntie Stella, very good Elie" Kevin told her, kissing the top of her head.

"Did she just talk?" asked Stella

"Yup! Kevin got Paul and Elie to say their first words!" I exclaimed, super excited.

"Aww, that's precious!" Stella gushed

We continued talking and playing with the babies in their nursery, attempting to get them to say more words. It wasn't until Joe and Stella took the twins out of Kevin and my arm's that I realized I hadn't seen Nick all morning.

"Hey guys" I started "Where is Nick?"

"Last I saw him he was on the phone in the kitchen" Stella replied while still trying to tickle Elie.

"Okay, well I'm going to go say good morning" I replied

"I'll go with you" Kevin whispered into my ear, as he intertwined our fingers.

I know I told Kevin that I wasn't sure if I could forget what Kevin had done to me, and take him back, but all the little things he had been doing all morning, was making difficult to not take him back in a second.

"Thank you" I whispered as we descended the stairs

"For what?" He asked, stopping both of us on the stairs, then turned to look me as I leaned on the rail.

"For leaving my favorite flower next to me, helping with the twins, and for trying to make things better, it means a lot to me" I continued to whisper, never looking into his eyes, instead the stairs grabbed my attention.

"Hey, look at me…" Kevin coaxed me into looking up "I know we may never get back to where we were before, but I just want you to know that I plan on helping with Paul and Elie as best I can, and I'm going to keep trying to make things better. You and those babies are my world, and I would give everything I have up for you three, my music, my fans, my stuffed bear in a bikini…"

I started laughing at the last one; "EVERYTHING Macy, I love you" He finished seriously.

"I love you too Kevin, but like I said last night, I don't know if I can trust you again, but I'm going to try" I replied hopeful, and then placed a soft kiss on his cheek.

"Well I hate to interrupt this reconciliation, but I need to talk to Kevin and Joe" Nick said uncertainly

"What's wrong Nick?" I asked, knowing his tone.

"What makes you think something is wrong?" Nick asked, his voice going higher pitch.

"Nick, what's up?" Kevin asked

"We have to leave here by 3 today" He responded quickly.

* * *

**Like I said earlier, it's a crazy time of year for me. My senior prom is next weekend, i have AP tests coming up, as well as graduation!! I'm excited! I hope you liked the newest chapter, for some odd reason i had a writers block, and then a couple days ago i had got an idea, and this is what came out of it. I have a few Nacy oneshots floating about in my head, as well as part of the next chapter halfway written, so be ono the look out. Thanks again for reading!**

**~Marina**


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